Saturday, 28 March 2009

Something for the Weekend

The stat-porn tells me I get much fewer visitors on the weekend than I do during the week, so most of you reading this will be currently experiencing Monday, probably. Eurgh, don't you just hate Mondays? Anyway, for me it's Friday night/Saturday morning, so time to blog.

First of all, I am sticking to my promise that anyone who a) follows me, and b) has a blog, will get some free publicity, courtesy of moi. So, without any further ado:

This is Sir Mitchell of Cashmore's blog, and I believe it's mainly based on a university module he's doing. Anyway, good guy, good blog, check-check-check it out!

Not much else to say for now, really. No Premier League predictions to do, as it's crappy international football this weekend. Eurgh, the cricket is completely off-topic, just cringeworthy.
So, two things. One, I'll be ignoring the football this weekend and tackling a book about the New York Yankees. I hope the weather is marvellous and agreeable for reading (wow, how posh was that sentence?!)
Finally, I was discussing with a fellow blogger how to increase the number of visitors to our humble blogs. We concluded that apart from advertising as much as possible, the only thing to do would be post a picture of a lady and hope that someone looks for that lady on google images and stumbles onto the blog. I don't know about you, but I think that is a disgusting idea. It just seems a bit shameless, and obvious. I can assure you, my dear readers, I won't resort to such disgraceful tactics.

Thursday, 26 March 2009

This is just too good to forget about Part 2

But most importantly, this:

That final clip might still be the funniest thing I've ever had the pleasure of watching - "Shatner's Bassoon" and "Joss Ackland's Spunky Backpack" being the highlights. It still makes me laugh now, especially considering it's twats like Edmonds, Manning and Brookes who cop it.

Wednesday, 25 March 2009

We Can Be Heroes

I read on a forum the other day that Bret "The Hitman" Hart is bringing out a book and will be coming to Birmingham next month to do a book signing. God, reading that brought back memories.

When I was a little kid I had heroes, as I'm sure everyone reading this had. Most of them were United players - Schmeichel, King Eric, Kanchelskis, Hughes. Some other sportsmen as well - Nick Faldo, the Chicago Bulls trio of MJ, Rodman and Pippen, Nasser Hussain, Alec Stewart, Darren Gough. But they all paled in comparison with The Hitman.

I used to watch WWF wrestling every night after primary school, and nothing got me in a fervour more than Bret Hart. Just his entrance music was enough to induce me into a manic fit.
I used to jump with joy when he won, and be on the verge of tears when bad men used to gang up on him and make him lose. And then at school the next day, my friends and I would passionately talk about the events as well as try to kill each other by copying the moves.
I also had a fascination with Bret's shades. Being a "good guy", when he came out to the ring he would always take off these ludicrous pink sunglasses and give them to a little brat in the crowd. I would have given my left arm for a pair of those, at the time. Here they are: I remember that advert, brilliant at the time, cringeworthy now.

Anyway, I know what you're thinking - so, Ewar, are you going to buy his book and queue up to meet him?

Sadly, the answer is no. I'm a bit too old for all that now, and I would feel rather stupid standing in a queue full of either 30 year olds wearing wrestling belts around their waists, or 11 year olds with their John Cena t-shirts who heard this dude used to be good.

But, thanks Bret. They were fun times - the joy and innocence of youth that can't be replicated. And just remember folks - he was the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever goddamn will be.

Tuesday, 24 March 2009


Eurgh - My goodness, I feel utterly dreadful. My throat is constantly dry and rather sore, my head is pounding, my whole body feels stiff and aching and I don't feel too confident re. my stomach either. These symptoms started on Sunday night, and meant I missed meeting Catherine O'Flynn, which I am so fucked off about it's beyond belief. My friend Merciless Public then blogging about how great it all was didn't help either, the lucky git.

I have an essay to write for Thursday, and a reading quiz to prepare for on Friday. Eurgh. I'll struggle through, moaning and groaning throughout. This will be my only post today, which is annoying considering I was going to blog about Curt Schilling and Bret "The Hitman" Hart, although not in the same post, obviously. Let me go and curl up somewhere warm and perish.

Hooray! - No, I'm not feeling any better. But the stat-porn this morning makes for interesting viewing. After the false dawn of the UAE visitor, I finally have my first foreign readers! Two visitors from Belgium towns rather close to each other. Welcome! I wonder if it was you who found my blog by typing "Tim Lovejoy is a dick" into google.

I also have another follower, so welcome, "Natural Blues". I don't know you personally, but I recognise you from the picture you have posted in your 'Poor Mum' post. I think you are in my How English Works module, right? As is now custom here at 'The Rise and Rise...' here is some free publicity for your blog, as thanks for following me:

Go and read/comment/follow/enjoy folks, another young person with a marvellous blog.

In the meantime, I'm going to read some cricket magazines in bed, before shouting at The Jeremy Kyle Show.

Monday, 23 March 2009

Mixed Bag

I'm annoyed to bump my apology to Laraine and Owain off the "top spot" on my blog, but blogging must go on! I do hope they read it. Anyway, this post will be a bit of a mixed bag, lots of stuff to ramble about/ponder.

Firstly, Premier League Predictions re-visited. I got 5 correct results, but 0 perfect scores. It is improvement, my friends. As for the weekend itself, we were humiliated, Scousers and Arsenal won, and it looks like the anti-football mobs of Bolton and Stoke (hides from Plashing Vole) are staying up. Hold me.

Secondly, I got all giddy when I looked at the stat-porn last night and found out that I had my first visitor from abroad! And not just any old place, no, only the fricking United Arab Emirates!
Sadly, about a nanosecond later the realisation hit me that it is not a curious Arab stranger, who stumbled upon this blog due to his love for Tim Lovejoy. No, it must be my old friend Joe, who is currently living out there, the lucky sod. Hope you and the team are doing great buddy.

Thirdly, it would be several shades of awesomeness if the IPL was to be played over here. I think it's a real shame that India cannot hold it, but nevertheless we should definitely strive to host it. And for that matter, if the security is good enough, how about Pakistan test matches as well?

Fourthly, there is no fourthly.

Finally, I have a new follower, and I'm excited to announce I don't know who he is! It's clearly someone from my English Lit. group, but as their profile tells me this person is 20, and they unfortunately suffer from tinnitus, it's not Shaun or Neil. intriguing. A sad reflection on my part that I don't actually know anyone else on the module.
Anyway, welcome aboard 'Demented Demon'! As a way of thanking you for following me, I'll be linking to your blog around about now:

Go and read it people! Here is a chap with interesting, purposeful things to say. In the meantime, I'll carry on linking to Super Mario games or talking about cricket.

Sunday, 22 March 2009

Laraine and Owain – An Apology

This afternoon I received a 'comment' from Laraine Adams. You might remember Laraine from something I posted last Monday, and which you can read again if you find my archives on the right of this page and click on “Let Me Tell You A Story...”

Laraine isn't too happy with me. I could have “rejected” her comment and thus not published it, but I'm not a coward, folks, which is why not only have I published her comment, but I'm also going to put it here as well, so that no-one can miss it:

Laraine Adams said...
Nice to see the article has been read, but I would like to point out that Owain had been out of hospital for 2 days after suffering a Stroke when he proposed. Not sure if you saw that bit of the article. I'm guessing you don't know many people who have had Strokes but if you had, you'd be aware that unfortunately Owain can't fly for 4 months, therefore whisking me to Paris to propose on top of the Eiffel Tower is out of the question, as is pretty much any sort of travel - he can't drive again until he gets an all clear from the doctor - so no travelling to a romantic spot somewhere on the Coast either, where it's 'quiet, romantic, peaceful and absolutely fucking freezing.' Also, just to reiterate HE HAD A STROKE!!!! That means very little energy, difficulty in walking and talking, weakness down the left hand side and a degree of brain damage. It's nice to know you think we are worthy of comment but to be honest I think until you've grown up a little, keep your comments to yourself. Prat.
22 March 2009 15:04

Laraine, the impression I got from the article was that your partner Owain was completely fine (in the long-term, after initial incident), thanks to your speedy and live-saving actions. Nowhere in the article* does it state that he suffered any of the symptoms mentioned by yourself in your comment. Heck the headline is: "Girl saves boyfriend from stroke following TV advert".
As I assumed** that Owain was completely fine, I was just trying to make a humorous point about something that had struck me whilst reading the article. I could not for the life of me understand why he proposed to you there, assuming*** that it is not your 'special place'. It was not mentioned anywhere in the article that it was.

However, having re-read my post, this paragraph:

'In a sodding tea room?! Jesus wept. I can only hope that this tea room is special to them, otherwise this is ridiculously lame. Put some effort into it man, jeez.'

was over-the-top, poor form and inexcusable. For that, I apologise to both of you. I cringed reading it, to be honest.

Just one final thing, Laraine. I know that you stumbled upon my blog by typing your own name into Google. I decided to do that also, and I found this:

Massive respect for what you and Owain are trying to do, and as a constructive way of apologising, I will be donating £10 to The Stroke Association people. If other readers wish to donate, here is a handy link for them:

So, sorry guys, and if Owain is offended by me calling you 'kinda cute', I also apologise for that. Thankyou for your comment, and if you wish to comment further, I will of course publish it. Have a great wedding day, and I wish you all the best.

**I know, never assume.
***I did it again!