Friday, 19 June 2009

Live-Blogging the Countdown Grand Final

15:23 I was looking for something to blog about, and whilst contemplating what I could ramble on about, a nice man on Channel 4 has just announced it's the Countdown Grand Final! SO HERE WE GO! Live-Blogging at short notice, this should be fun.

15:24 C'mon Queenie, make Jeff Stelling a Sir.

15:25 Rachel Riley looking fabulous. Not as nice as Susie Dent, the ultimate MILF, but there we go. And you thought I watched this programme for educational reasons?

15:26 It's Kirk Bevans vs Jimmy Gough!

15:27 Dr Phil Hammond! What a genius.

15:29 PEDANTS for 7. I win.

15:30 Dr Phil does a joke, and NO-ONE laughs. Marvellous.

15:31 Is POLLER a word? If so, for 6. I win.

15:32 Rachel is wearing a massive yellow belt buckle. Looks a bit garish contrasted to her white dress.

15:33 Susie is embarrassed she didn't get "Nounal". I didn't even think the word existed.

15:34 Bored of letters now, let's have some numbers, c'mon.

15:35 EMAILERS is not a proper word, for fucks sake.

15:35 75 x 3 = 225. Add on the 6, the 4, and the 5. 240! I WIN!

15:36 Dr Phil Hammond has a dummy, business is about to pick up.

15:37 Dr Phil just made a joke about Susie grabbing a man "down below". I'm not going to lie, I'm now aroused.

15:40 1st break "teaser" is SOAPSUDS. I win. Going to pop downstairs and get some food, the tension is killing me.

15:44 Back to it. It's Bevans 45-32 Gough, in case you care. Which you probably don't.

15:47 I've got to be honest, this isn't the best thing to Live-blog, particularly if no-one else is watching it. I'm sure some pensioners are watching somewhere, sucking on some Werthers Originals.

15:48 Christ, these guys are good. Probably why they're in the final. I love the way they sigh and say "Only 6" when I've struggled to a 5.

15:50 WAPITI? What the shit is that? Geez.

15:51 I love Susie Dent so much. She would be the best person to open up a dictionary and look up rude words with. That first bit is not a deliberate euphemism.

15:53 My god, Bevans is a fucking machine. 74-45, all over. He is amazing.

15:54 Second break "teaser" is TATTOOED. God, I amaze myself.

15:59 My brother has just come home from school, and as a treat my mother has bought some cream cakes. Please excuse the pause in live-blogging that will now take place. SCHOLAR for 7! I win!

16:04 That was brilliant, neither of the two got the numbers round, and then Jeff got it! The man is an all-round genius.

16:05 Conundrum...and no-one got it. GRANIVORE. I'm as bemused as you are.

16:06 Well done to Kirk "The Kirkulator" Bevans!

16:08 It's all over, the next series starts on............Monday. Right.

16:09 Well, that was fun. Back to Royal Ascot, and pondering what sensible thing I can blog about.


  1. almost as amazing as kirk bevans is the fact that when i googled "kirk bevans" not one minute after the adverts, this post was the first hit. amazing!

  2. Thankyou, r howard!

    I hope blueyonder is faring you well, and that the weather is nice in Bristol!

  3. You should stop being creepy towards your commenters. I don't tease my readers by telling them that I know that they've been searching for 'Sophie Raworth boobs' or 'naughty Sophie Raworth'.

  4. >r howard said...
    >almost as amazing as kirk bevans is the fact >that when i googled "kirk bevans" not one >minute after the adverts, this post was the >first hit. amazing!

    Possibly because it's spelt Bevins!

  5. Vande, I can only apologise. They teach you well at Oxford!