Thursday, 17 December 2009


Let's just round this nonsense off before Christmas. You may remember a few weeks back I gave the opportunity for my readers to suggest a topic for me to blog about. I've tackled Dan's suggestion, so let's now have Cynical Ben's:

Benjamin Judge said...

Straw hats. Good or bad?

Short answer - Very good.

Long answer - Straw hats for me are wonderfully English. They bring to my mind a perfect summers day, and an English gentleman enjoying a spot of cricket somewhere beautiful like Arundel. He has a picnic, with the egg sandwiches, scones and Pimms. His wife is wearing a flowery dress. Their son will be sitting quietly, absorbing the cricket, whilst their daughter will be making daisy chains and sipping ginger beer.

His name will be something like Quentin de Forrest, and he'll politely applaud as the opening batsman passes 50. He'll vote Conservative, as he knows he can't trust Labour with his money, which he has plenty of, as he's a high-quality conveyancer. He's the kind of person who Nigel Havers has based his whole acting career on.

But the most important thing about him? The thing that sums up his Englishness? It's the straw hat, my friends. It is the straw hat.

A perfect hat, for the perfect English gentleman. We praise thee, straw hats!


  1. That'll be scone pronounced "scons" then.

  2. No, because Quentin, like us educated people, know how to "speak proper".

  3. A lovely piece on straw hats, a few minor differences aside on political belief and choice of beverage aside of course.

    Also, without wanting to become a dick about this -isn't that more a panama hat sort of man? A straw hat is, to my eyes, a little bit more frivolous. It is a hat, I feel, a hat with an eye for the ladies.

  4. Panama Hats just remind me of Indiana Jones for some reason...

  5. I really enjoyed reading this – you forgot the cucumber sandwiches with the crusts cut off.